What do I do with my time? I get that question from people sometimes…or at least I feel like people question me. I feel like some people look at me and say you are a stay at home mom….you are home all day why are you complaining about not having time…all you have is time. To that I say HA! Let me run you thru my day. Remember that thru my day I am constantly repeating myself trying to teach manners, keeping them safe, answering curiosities, encouraging creativity and resoursfulness, potty training, disapline, chosing to do things right instead of using short term fixes to solve problems at everyone's long term expense.
By this time its 8:30 or 9:00 and finally my turn to take a shower. This is my “alone time”, I use that term loosely as during my shower I’m still yelling at kids to share or stop yelling or please close the curtain so water doesn’t get on the floor and not to poke at the babies eyes or lick the mirror. Then I get dressed and try to get ready, although some days it just doesn’t happen. After I get out I clean up whatever went down during my shower whether it is toys, crayons on the floor, wall, or books or cupboard items. Then you try to find an activity to entertain the girls. Some days its play dough, some days we do stickers or markers or crayons, maybe Barbie’s or ponies, but some kind of activity is then followed by a snack. While the girls snack so does the baby with another feeding and burping.
Then we usually watch some TV like Mickey Mouse or Handy Manny while I check my email or write on my blog or learn with the kiddos and play with the baby. Then we make lunch and eat lunch around 12 or 1. Then we do another round of diaper changes and potty training, which can take 5 minutes or 30 depending on how cooperative everyone is and what has happened in those diapers. Ideally this would then be followed by a nap but things are not always easy and naps are postponed or avoided by young ones. Most days naps are not taken by all at the same time, someone will fall asleep while the other plays with me and then we switch someone falls asleep when the other wakes up so I’m constantly entertaining someone. After naps we usually do a snack and new cup and new diapers. Then another activity like read a book or play dress up or make believe house tea parties. And again feed the baby and burp. Then we have to figure out what is for dinner and make that.
Dad gets home and I get dinner in the oven and talk to him about his day and upcoming events and our day at home. I try to get the girls to clean up some of the days mess during this time which means I sit there and point the a toy and say “pick up the yellow Barbie, now put it in the bin. Pick up the puppy, now put it in the basket, pick up the socks put it on the laundry, pick up the bear and put it on the tub…and on and on and on and on! You can just say clean your room. You have to break it down to each item for them otherwise nothing happens for day! Then we all clean up for dinner, say our prayers, eat and then the cleanup and bedtime begins. This includes baths, diapers, pajamas, cups, crying, yelling, screaming, cuddling, and lights out, another feeding and burping and most nights more yelling, screaming, crying, and discipline. By this I’m exhausted and ready to crawl into bed and just veg a few moments with my husband before falling to sleep which almost always is interrupted by at least one feeding.
Not too bad you say….until you realize that in that time I still have to try to pay the bills, do laundry for 5 people which can be one to two loads a day, dishes which is always one load a day, vacuuming, general pick up, running to the store, the post office, goodwill, Wal-Mart, Walgreens, cleaning off counters. Then the tings that need to be done every so often like deep cleaning of bedrooms, and bathrooms, and doctors appointments, maintenance calls, bug man visits, dusting, bedding. The list goes on and on.
Oh yeah that’s right….then try to fit a workout in there along with time to do little things like shave your legs or paint your toes…read a little or watch TV that’s not a cartoon. So next time that you catch yourself asking a stay at home mom what she does all day…pause, rethink, and remember that this is our full time job…24/7…no over time, no holidays, few breaks and sometimes feeling underappreciated. We do it because we love our families and want to see them thrive. We love our jobs, but it is hard work and it goes unrecognized too often. Just realize we don’t sit around all day and twiddle our thumbs and make and effort to put yourself in our shoes before judging what we do with our time.
I wake up when my kids get up around 6:30 or 7:00. I make breakfast for everyone weather that be cereal, waffles, French toast a banana, whatever and of course cups of milk. While the toddlers are eating I go breastfeed my 6 month old. This is a process mind you. Babies don’t just eat real fast and are done. He eats about 10 minutes each side then you have to burp him and that’s a 5 to 10 minute process depending how much air he swallowed while eating. Then you change three diapers, put lotion on three kids, and get three children dressed. Again this is not an easy task as they don’t just get dressed it’s a fight to get feet into pants and socks and arms into shirts…and you have to catch them first to even get the clothes on!
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